Hello, dear readers (all three of you), have ya missed me? It’s alright. Lie to me. I suffer from cripplingly low self-esteem and a constant gnawing hunger for approval. I shall now explain the reason for my absence over the last month and a half. You ready? It’s a doozy.
I got a life.
I know, crazy, right? I didn’t even have time to play video games – spare minutes were dedicated to my number one and number two favorite hobbies – movies and the Internet. Anyway, that life has been lived and now I’m back, living on the internet (where it’s easier to be cool cuz no one can see my face) – and I’m ready to burden you with my inane commentary on movies, video games, comics, etc. etc.
And, just so this post is somewhat relevant to the content of this blog, I present a list of things I have learned in the past few months – while I do love my Xbox, I will always love my PlayStation more; when given the choice between clothes and Blu-Rays, I will always pick Blu-Rays; Spider-Man is my hero; and, when procrastinating, I get really invested in learning the words to viral videos like the Bed Intruder song. Also, when I drink too much caffeine, not only do I fuck up my stomach lining, I also get the shits. TMI? TFB (Too Friggin’ Bad. I’m in your computer screens, makin’ up lingo – I’m Juno-like in that way.)
So, dear readers – never you fear. I shan’t abandon you again. In fact, just to prove myself to you all, I do solemnly swear to make an amazingly educational, yet entertaining, post within the next week. Count on it.