Tag Archives: Resident Evil

The Menace’s Top Five Fictional Ladycrushes

5 Oct

So when I asked MegaWoman about our “top 5 childhood crushes”, I asked if I could perhaps include a female. This was decided against as we’d have much too hard of a time trying to choose 5 (male OR female) of our crushes, and also, we wanted to up the girl-on-girl factor on this blog, as if there wasn’t enough already.

5. Faith – Buffy the Vampire Slayer

I watched Buffy religiously in high school, until… Buffy realized she had a young sister, and I realized I was not a fan of Michelle Trachtenberg so I promptly stopped watching the show. Also, maybe I got distracted by boys. Hmm. Can’t remember. Despite my addiction to the show, I wasn’t a hardcore fan of any one character until season 3, when Faith showed up, who was the complete opposite of Buffy, and wore better clothes (or so I thought, at the time). She was also extremely troubled and at times, a villain. But I believe her character arc left the deepest impression on me because her attitude changed through a series of prettydamncrazy events, and her “change” was gradual enough for me to believe–it was admirable, despite all the cringe-worthy things she actually did.

Arashi Kishuu / X-1999

Arashi Kishuu. Image via pixel-ellipsis.net.

4. Arashi Kishuu – X/1999

Arashi is the solemn–err, shy? Mysterious? Withdrawn? All of the above? Dragon of Heaven. A sword shoots out from her hand. She’s also the “soul mate” of Sorata–and they have an awkward, high-school-type romance throughout, that at times, forces her to reveal her emotional, human side. I won’t even go into detail or reveal spoilers but their romance is one of the most memorable in my anime history.

Sayuki & Mako, Initial D

Sayuki (left), Mako (right) of Impact Blue / Initial D

3. Sayuki – Initial D

The quick-thinking, feisty half of Impact Blue, Sayuki was my absolute favorite character in the entire Initial D series. She knows what she wants, goes after it and doesn’t beat around the bush. We definitely need more females like that in media.

Alice, Resident Evil

This red dress is kind of iconic. Image via cobolhacker.com

2. Alice – Resident Evil (movies)

Badass and stylish while battling the undead. Also, Milla Jovovich.

Callisto from Xena, Warrior Princess

Callisto, my #1 mad girl crush

1. Callisto – Xena, Warrior Princess

The more I think about it, the more I begin to think that Faith and Callisto are perhaps the same character, set in different time periods, with different monsters to battle. Callisto was probably the only person who could ever best Xena, which always made for an exciting match between the two. She also didn’t give a fuck and wore a damn hot outfit. Even though Callisto was pretty much psycho and very scary at times–her spontaneity and utter lack of emotion made for an incredibly captivating character.

Milla Jovovich Can Punch You in the Baby-Maker

16 Sep

If you’re a loyal reader to this new blog, you’re going to have to agree with me when I state that MILLA JOVOVICH IS HOT. We will never become friends if you disagree with that statement. In the world of ass-kicking movie babes, I bow down to Angelina Jolie as Lara Croft, but Angelina is obviously, as we know, not human, but rather, a goddess. (You’re allowed to disagree with me on that statement)

So as much as I love Angelina, why is it that I might love Milla more? Because, my friends, if you haven’t noticed, Milla Jovovich is not your typical hot, multi-tasking entertainer. When I mention “typical” I meant = huge boobs. I rejoice because Milla is kind of flat-chested. Yeah, I check other girls out. So deal.

Milla Jovovich and Paul W.S. Anderson

I think of it this way.... we can wear a deep V w/o worrying. Photo via celebrific.com

Other bloggers in this group are more blessed in the bust area (no names yet), but me being your “typical” Taiwanese girl, I wasn’t so lucky in this department. It probably did not help that I ran cross-country and track for 5 years as I was “developing”, so wearing all those sports bras might have contributed to my current situation. But I realized something during this time–it’s easier to kick ass minus that weight, realistically-speaking. Just think about it–if we had to sneak through a narrow alleyway I could probably fit through it NO PROBLEM. If I was an Amazonian woman I wouldn’t need to cut off one of my boobs to be an efficient archer! If… alright, you got me, I got some boob envy. Hey, at least I’m honest about it, right?

But enough about boobs on a Friday morning. Milla, if you didn’t know, is also a supermodel and quite the musician. She can SING. REALLY. Check it out below.

And since I’m obsessing here’s the Ultraviolet trailer. She looks awesome in it. Also, my dad owns this movie.

And you know what? She’s really the only model who’s successfully made the transition to film. I remember seeing her for the first time in “The Fifth Element”–one of my all-time favorite movies, and… perhaps it was the orange hair or the funky band-aid strap outfit we first saw her in, but I instantly became a fan. I didn’t think she was hot, but she kicked THE MOST ASS IN THE MOVIE, I’M SURE YOU CAN AGREE. AND THEN SHE WAS IN ZOOLANDER!! WHO CAN FORGET THE 2nd BEST LINE IN THE MOVIE–“I suggest you and your Kmart Jaclyn Smith Collection outfit… stay the hell away from Derek Zoolander!” (The best line being Christine Taylor’s retort, obviously… speaking of which, I remember MegaWoman and I having this conversation and realizing that we needed to be friends immediately afterwards) I’m glad to see her film career skyrocket afterwards, without her needing to end up in some cheesy romance flick about a girl with too many shoes or signing onto a film that eventually sees J.Lo replacing her.

Milla in Fifth Element

No, I will never make this costume for Halloween. Image via viewpoints.com

If not for Milla, I would not be going to watch Resident Evil: Afterlife tonight. The first movie was awful beyond belief. I actually laughed during the laser hallway/room scene because the effects were so sheisty.

Milla Jovovich L'Oreal

OMG! Milla! Why are you so amazing?! Old L'Oreal ad.

Now that I think about it, I’m not sure if you can even hate this woman, because other flat-chested girls like me aren’t jealous of the large rack she doesn’t have, and she can probably help you survive a zombie apocalypse if that happens in the next few years.

One of my favorite fight scenes ever.

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