True Jedi

Image via videogamesblogger.com

I know I should have been doing my taxes last night and not playing my new Lego Star Wars III: Clone Wars game, but my only justification is that I didn’t want to stare at my computer screen anymore, so why not stare at a 3D video and deteriorate my vision?

I’m still getting used to the 3DS considering I just got this game yesterday, and I already forgot to save–legitimately I forgot that the “start” button was on the bottom of the screen and instead of hitting “Start” to pause the game, I “accidentally” hit the “POWER” button. Good thing I was only bout 1.3% into the game, otherwise, random objects would have been thrown.

So even though I’ve played about 3 hours of this game thus far, I can already tell you that the battery life on the 3DS is AWFUL. I played for 3 hours and I got the low battery warning. About 5 mins later the game system shut off. Again, I didn’t get to a checkpoint to save. Can you tell it was not such a good night?

On the bright side, with the Lego Star Wars games, you can always go back to a previous level after you’ve acquired certain characters (Jedi’s, Siths, Bounty Hunters…) and access different parts of the stage, so I didn’t really mind replaying certain parts of the game, even though recollecting all those tokens is not so enjoyable the 3rd time around. How is the gameplay on this system with this particular game? It’s very similar to the Lego Star Wars III: Clone Wars for the PS3. Obviously, some of the “challenges” have been adjusted to fit the 3DS–use of the stylus, for example. If you’ve ever played one of those Lego video games, you’d probably understand why the difficulty level is generally low on these games, but they are still very enjoyable and clever in adapting the content into a game. For instance, Jedi characters being able to use the Force to move objects around, using your lightsaber to scale walls, cut holes into doorways… the little details were not missed.

I think the one drawback to playing games on the 3DS though, is how I felt the 3D graphics were screwing with my eyes. If you don’t hold the 3DS at the correct angle while you play, the images look blurry and trippy since only the top screen is in 3D. I felt like this after about an hour and a half, then I turned the 3D off. The images then seemed too flat and unexciting to me so I turned the 3D settings back up again. I just don’t think I can play on this system for a long time even though the colors are so vivid and I much prefer the Circle Pad over the Control Pad.

Looking at the graphics on this system though, makes me VERY excited for “Ocarina of Time”, because I look forward to … spending weekends staying at home conquering temples…. and stuff…

AWWWYEAAAHH REMIXES

If you “liked” us on Facebook, this post will include media I have already posted previously, and then some.

I do spend (time well spent is not time wasted) a lot of time on the internet–guilty of creating my own captions for memes too…. and sometimes I do find some pretty cool shiyet. This cool shiyet is usually in the form of music. Sometimes it’s “a holy light has shone from above”! As in the case of these video game-related remixes below:

1. Super Smash Bros. Melee MIX by Middle Finger Music

2. The Legend of Zelda Electrixx Remix by Electrixx

3. Star Wars intro by Asian Trash Boy (not a video game but it’s too superb for me not to post)

4. Nintendo mash-up with Legend of Zelda theme, Mario Bros. theme and Tetris theme by Yenn

5. Sonic the Hedgehog theme mash-up with ATB’s “Don’t Stop” by FunWithBonus

6. Tetris theme (Boo Remix)

7. Ocarina of Time electro medley by The Bea7nix

8. Tomb Raider theme (Lo-Gravity Remix) by Vertigo

And these are all guaranteed to be much more interesting with some Captain Shepard dancing: http://www.gifsoup.com/view/321301/shepard-dance.html

There are a ton of other remixes out there but these are just a few of my favorites; it’s always nice to see these classic melodies being remixed and reintroduced.

How appropriate! You fight like a cow!

AVAST THERE, LANDLUBBERS! Prepare yeselves. I’m about to pillage your poop deck. With a big, girth-y, black… eyepatch. On my eye. You thought I was gonna say ‘dildo’, right? For shame. No, we’re here to talk about Monkey Island. It’s fangirl time.

The Monkey Island games hold a place very close to my heart – it was the second adventure game I ever played (preceded only by 1996’s Freddi Fish: The Case of the Haunted Schoolhouse.) The Oregon Trail gateway drug of PC games tossed me into a cesspool of wasted hours, hunched over the keyboard as I quested and puzzle solved my way to carpal tunnel, near-sightedness, and a grossly high WPM.

The Curse of Monkey Island (the third installment in the Monkey Island series) found its way into my hands back in the year 2000 in a desperate attempt to find something a little more challenging (and a little less for pussies) than Rockett’s Secret Invitation. It was love at first click.

Monkey Island is a humorous self-referential series about a man named Guybrush Threepwood, who washed up on shore one day with no memories and only one goal – to become a mighty pirate. His adventures send you careening and buccaneering through the Caribbean, encountering trials, tribulations, and an unforgettable cast of characters (one of my favorites of which is a tough-talkin’ jerk of a skull named Murray). One of the most self-aware games I’ve ever played (Guybrush breaks the fourth wall on the regular, and even spouts such gems as, “Goodbye, cruel adventure game!”), Monkey Island is also consistently funny due to the brilliant writing and endless one-liners.

One of the most appealing aspects of the series is that it’s a game that has a protagonist with a personality. Unlike many of the more popular games of today, Monkey Island does not rely on a bland, muscle-bound, gruff, weapon-toting hero through which the (likely obese) player can live vicariously – instead, Guybrush is very much his own person, and an extremely likable one at that, much in part to the voice talents of Dominic Armato. It should also be noted that Guybrush is singularly responsible for my taste in men. Thin, witty, and with a sense of humor.

The series order is as follows: The Secret of Monkey Island, Monkey Island 2: LeChuck’s Revenge, The Curse of Monkey Island, Escape from Monkey Island, and Tales of Monkey Island. Debuting in 1990 and continuing (with agonizing years-long hiatuses in between) ever since, the series has experienced a revival due to the collaboration of LucasArts and TellTale Games on Tales of Monkey Island in 2009.

An updated version of first game was concurrently developed and released the same year as The Secret of Monkey Island: Special Edition. For those who want to get into the series, I’d recommend downloading it on LucasArts.com, Xbox Live Arcade, or the Playstation Network. Insult sword-fighting, evil demon zombie ghost pirates, Carnivals of the Damned, steel drum music – it’s all just good, piratical fun!

FATAL ATTRACTION. IN YOUR GAME SYSTEM.

Remember Heavy Rain? I didn’t play it, but from what I heard, it was a pretty dramatic game. There was some romance involved, am I right?

There aren’t too many games for the XBOX or the PS3 focusing their spotlight on romance, in-game, but “Catherine” dares to change this. You do not make your characters fall in love or have seks. Rather, you are trying to escape from your nightmares because you HAD AN AFFAIR AND NOW YOUR MISTAKE WON’T LEAVE YOU ALONE!

AKA: FATAL ATTRACTION MEETS THE CELL —  Choose your own adventure-style.

I am digging the style of the graphics–it is just me or does Vincent (the protagonist) remind you a LITTLE bit of Spike Spiegel? Whenever I see blonde pigtails I think Sailormoon. So we’ve got Spike Spiegel and slutty Usagi-chan in this raunchy video game.

Image via gamestop.com

Image via gamestop.com

But seriously, you play as Vincent, who meets the mysterious Catherine at a bar one night and perhaps has a little too much fun with her, despite the fact he has a long-term girlfriend, Katherine, to go home to. He is later plagued by nightmares in which his life is constantly at stake, and must “survive” each nightmare, as the lines between reality and the dreamworld blur. Not only do you have to battle and solve puzzles during the nightmares, you must eventually choose between Catherine and Katherine. Oh, and did I mention that random young men have been dying, while sleeping? Suddenly, Dan Gallagher’s life doesn’t seem so difficult.

The game was recently released in Japan (February 2011) and is slated for its North American release on July 26, 2011.

It’s My Birthday I’ll Play Pokemon If I Want To

Although I do like Pokemon a lot, it does not get my pants all wet. I’m referring to the Black Dude Who Loves Pokemon. If you haven’t seen that yet I highly suggest you watch it, that way you can imagine my excitement -100% of the sexual jokes. That man is just horny about Pokemon.

Anyway, I did reserve my copy of Pokemon White at Gamestop and immediately went to pick it up, disappointed that it did not come with coolfreestuff–I heard that Target was giving away ARTBOOKS with your purchase of Pokemon Black or White, and there was also a special edition DSi that came with either Black or White. I have other useless crap to collect so of course I did not purchase the special edition DSi. (By “other useless crap” I mean, that I ordered the “Tron” collectors’ edition package which includes the remix CD, a glow-in-the-dark Daft Punk/Tron poster, and a 5-disc DVD/CD.)

Special edition Pokemon Black + DSi. Image via google.com

Special edition Pokemon White + DSi. Image via google.com

I finally beat the Elite Four in my Pokemon SoulSilver game today so I felt it was appropriate to start playing Pokemon White. Loading the game into my DSi, I immediately realized that the new intro to Pokemon was pretty epic. Some kid gets CROWNED. What is this, THE LEGEND OF ZELDA!?!?! After I made that remark, my friend who ALSO purchased the game said the exact same thing.

I did a really stupid thing and forgot to save after leveling up my Pokemon to a good level and after catching 2 Pokemon and leveling THEM up as well so it was a fail-tastic hour of my life, but if you had lost interest in playing the Pokemon games I will briefly highlight what I thoroughly enjoyed about this new edition of the series:

1. Battle animations. The pokemon do not just stand there and move a few pixels forward. They actually fold their arms or bounce around. My Oshawott looks like a flailing otter. Still cute though.

2. Seasons. You start off playing the game during Autumn, and leaves blow around the screen for a dramatic effect. I wonder if you get to change your attire come Winter because walking around in a short-sleeved jacket would not be wise.

3. Guessing what type of new Pokemon you will encounter. I don’t really do my research whenever I hear about new Pokemon, I just guess by the name and how it looks, and like to be surprised, pleasantly or not. The developers made it easy for us lazyasses by making the water Pokemon (my favorites) looking like they came from the ocean, or coloring them blue. Because if there’s one thing I learned from video games, blue=water.

4. That one Pokemon not chosen by you or your rival is no longer FOREVERALONE. (Usually the plant Pokemon, amirite??) You start with 2 friends in the town–Cheren and Bianca. Bianca is an airhead, I am sorry. Not hating on the girls here. She has a big ass though, lol.

Cheren & Bianca. Image via pokemon-sp.jp

5. The game is finally supposed to be harder. I can see this already as I have been running into the same 2-3 Pokemon in the first 2 cities, so you’re a bit stuck with training these Pokemon in order to progress properly in the game.

I wish I could say I played the game a lot more but UNFORTUNATELY I FORGOT TO SAVE PROPERLY SO…. I am going to sit in the corner and facepalm for the rest of the night.

I also found this comic today which illustrated my exact experience at Gamestop today…