33ish Ideas for Simple Geeky Costumes

Unlike The Menace, I’m a lazy geek with minimal sewing abilities. Rather than attempt and fail to construct detailled and elaborate costumes, I stick to costumes that work with what I have in my closet and require the purchase of three accessories max.

Here are some simple, quick, yet geeky costumes that you can put together in time for Halloween (which is only three days away!). These are the ones I thought up yesterday; any other ideas?

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Guys:

Wolverine: Wife beater. Jeans. Dogtags. Leather jacket. Prop claws. Cigar, Sideburns. Five bucks for plastic claws, three for fake sideburns  and scruff (free if you’ve got the hairy genes to grow it yourself).

Superboy: Black T-shirt with red Superman S (can be made out of red tape). Jeans. Sunglasses optional.

Bruce Wayne: Suit. Shirt unbuttoned to reveal Batman symbol underneath?

The Penguin: Tuxedo. Umbrella. Top Hat. Pointy nose. Cigarette in holder. Monocle.

Warren Worthington III: Blonde hair. Jeans. Large angel wings.

Silver Surfer: Silver speedo. Silver bodypaint. Silver swim cap to make yourself look bald. Silver surfboard (can just be carboard cut into the shape and spray painted). Contacts if you want the full effect.

Dr. Manhattan: Blue bodypaint. Blue swim cap to make yourself look bald. Draw in a circle with a dot in the centre of your forehead. Contacts and dark eye makeup. Black biker shorts or speedo or man thong or…you know.

Angel: Dark clothing. Leather jacket. Hair gel. Broody attitude. Maybe vampire fangs.

Waldo: Red and white striped shirt and beanie. Reans. Round glasses. It’s so much better if you surround yourself with people dressed similarly but slightly differently so that it’s like you’re actually hidden in a Where’s Waldo book.

Chuck: White short sleeved shirt. Skinny grey tie. Pens in pocket. Nerd Herd nametag. Bonus points if you have a hot blonde girlfriend in a orange tank top or leather.

Shaun of the Dead: Red tie. White shirt. Red pen in pocket. Nametag. Bloody cricket bat. Bouquet of yellow flowers. Zombie best friend a plus.

The Hulk: Purple shorts. Green body paint. Dark hair.

Severus Snape: Long black robe. Wand. Greasy hair. Big nose and Slytherin colours optional.

Captain Hammer: Hammer T-shirt. Cargo pants tucked into combat boots. Welder’s gloves.

Hiro Nakamura: All black clothing. Draw on a soul patch. Samurai sword.

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Girls:

Baroness: Skin tight, all black clothes. Awesome boots, Glasses. Red Cobra symbol on your chest, (can be made using red tape). Maybe a prop machine gun and ammo belt. Wig if necessary.

Catwoman: Skin tight, all black clothes. Cat ears. Broad gold belt at hip level (can be made out of spray painted cardboard?) and gold coin necklace. Mask. Wig if necessary. Or, alternatively, just boots and a whip.

Ramona Flowers: Cute, punk clothes. Several belts. Colourful wig. Rollerblades or cool boots. Those goggles might be a little hard to find, but you could do without them and still be recognisable. Circle purse with a star. Giant hammer is a plus.

Emma Frost: Blonde hair. White lingerie/bathing suit/corset. White boots. White cape.

She Hulk: Suit. Purple undershirt for a hint of who she is. Green body paint. Wig if necessary. Nametag and briefcase optional. (As a law student, it’s my go-to back-up costume)

Smurfette: White dress. Blue bodypaint, Blonde wig if necessary.

Black Canary: Black bathing suit. Leather jacket. Fishnets. Combat boots. Blonde wig if necessary. Motorbike optional.

Poison Ivy: Green body paint. Red wig if necessary. Leaves glued to a bikini.

Starbuck: Backwards black racerback tank top. Khakis. Combat boots. Hexagonal dogtags. Cigar. Short blonde hair. Tattoo on left arm.

Barbara Gordon/Oracle: Red hair. Wheelchair. Glasses. Laptop and escrima sticks optional.

Leia: Extra large white turtleneck. Long white skirt. Belt. Hair in distinctive buns.

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Pairs:

The Doctor and Companion: so many options here, including but not limited to:

• 9: Leather jacket, Jeans. Dark shirt. Big nose and ears.
• 10: Blue or brown pinstriped suit. Slight sideburns. Converse. Trenchcoat optional.
• 11: Bowtie. Suspenders. Fez. Dress shirt and sweater(vest).
• Rose: Pink or purple. Dirty blonde hair.
• Martha: Red leather jacket. Jeans.

Mulder and Scully: Suits that look like they’re from the 80’s. Trenchcoats. Red hair for Scully.  You can print out prop X-Files FBI badges.

Lois Lane and Clark Kent: Lois = suit and Daily Planet press pass (can be printed from the internet).

Clark = Option 1: Flannel. Jeans. Glasses. Shirt unbuttoned to reveal Superman Symbol underneath. Option 2: Business Casual. Tie. Glasses. Daily Planet press pass. Shirt unbuttoned to reveal Superman Symbol underneath.

Tony Stark and Pepper Potts: Pepper = suit. Crazy high heels.

Tony= Option 1: Wife beater. Jeans,. Goatee. Glow-y arc reactor hanging around his neck and under the wife beater. (I’ve arc reactor necklaces for sale in Halloween stores so I know it’s available; or you could use two glow sticks and electrical tape to achieve the same effect.) Option 2: Suit with arc reactor glow showing through.

Cloak and Dagger: Black guy with a goatee in a black cloak. White girl in skin tight white clothes with relevant sections cut out. Blonde wig if necessary.

Jay and Kay: Suits. Sunglasses. One black guy, one white guy.

Pumpkin Pi: Orange shirt with pumpkin face (can be made using black electrical tape). Pi shirt.

X, X, Baby!

I’ve been blogging a lot about X-Men-related stuff recently, but that’s probably because I recently reread Joss “Geek God” Whedon‘s Astonishing X-Men run and it got me in the mood. And it’s my blog, so. Leave me alone, I do what I want.

The first issue of Marjorie Liu‘s X-23 came out a couple of weeks ago and it looks to be a fairly promising endeavor. Generally I give a title a few issues before I subject it to the harsh judging wrath of my most unsympathetic slitty Azn eyes. I’m a generous soul, I know. For the uninformed, X-23 is a female clone of WOLVERIIIINE (whenever I say ‘Wolverine’ I have to say it really loud and drag out the I. And I wonder why I have no friends), created in an attempt to replicate the Weapon X experiment. She first appeared in the X-Men: Evolution series, then made the jump to print to become part of the comic book canon. She basically has Wolverine’s powers, except she has two claws in each hand instead of three and has toe claws too. Like a velociraptor. I LOVE VELOCIRAPTORS.

I love X-23. Not because of her personality, god no, I’m far too shallow for that. I just think she looks so friggin’ awesome! Good-looking and badass. Readers (all three of you – hey, Mom!) should know that my favorite holiday is Halloween. I take it very seriously. Mainly ’cause it’s the one day (outside of any convention-related holidays) that you can dress up in costumes and not look like a fool (one day I tried wearing my top hat around while doing errands and ended up taking it off because of the unending confused stares I got.) Knowing this information, you’ll get the gravity of my meaning when I say that next year, I plan to dress up as X-23 (this year I’m going as Tifa Lockheart, of Final Fantasy VII fame.) That’s how much I dig this chick’s style. She’s my gymspiration and the inspiration for badassery.

Give the Marvel vs. Capcom 3 gameplay vid below a looksee to see X-23 in action. What’s up with that super-froofy pop song in the background? What, just ’cause she’s a girl means she can’t get awesome guitar riffs and dark tones? Those trailer designer bitches.

Confession time.

I spent several hours last week searching for an adamantium-colored nail polish so I could paint my nails the color of X-23/Wolverine’s claws. Stop laughing and fuck your face with your mom’s dildo – I’m a girl.

SNIKT BUB BUB SNIKT

Last Wednesday, the third and final issue of the X-Force: Sex and Violence series was released. I had a lot of shit to do that day, so I arrived at the comic book store right when it opened and grabbed a copy. Unfortunately, it was the only comic I wanted that week, so when I paid for my singular purchase, I looked like a complete pervert. Like a fat man, picking at his bellybutton through his sweat-stained t-shirt, asking for a nudie mag from behind the convenience store counter. X-Force: Sex and Violence. GODDAMN THAT TITILATING TITLE!

And since we’re on the topic of the X-Men, we’ll continue with it ‘cause that’s the way I roll, yeah, baby – check dis out, biznitch. I be so legitly OCD that I gots to have all my blog entries have an interconnecting, cohesive theme, yo. The first issue of the Uncanny X-Force comes out on October 6th. Check out the trailer below:

For those of you who are too lazy to watch an awesome one minute (and twenty-one seconds) clip, basically the point is that Wolverine assembles a new black-ops X-Force team with Archangel, Psylocke, Deadpool (HUZZAH!), and Fantomex. And they’re gonna kill Apocalypse. Wolverine’s really creative, I know. ANYWAY, that trailer makes it look legitly amazing and I’m super stoked. It should be some bloody, action-packed fun.

Apparently the Archangel/Psylocke romance is going to be rekindled, which I’m happy about only ’cause I’m hoping Deadpool will get to make some cracks about their relationship, maybe try to start a good-natured man-conversation about past sexual conquests. ‘Cause Wolverine gets so much ass. It’s weird – girls don’t really brag about that, they’re not like “oh yeah, there were like, three dicks in my mouth last night, it was AWESOME” or “one guy was in one hole, the other guy was in the other, it was like I was a pig on a spit roast at a Hawaiian barbecue, it was AWESOME.” It’s just harder to use dirty similes in conversation when you’re a chick. Goddammit, I’m jealous of guys.

(all photos from marvel.com)

Snikt, bub.

A couple of weeks ago, I was reading up on the next X-Men Origins: Wolverine movie (which will hopefully be better than the first, ‘cause if it’s not I’ll be forced to commit harakiri) and I came across a startling piece of information…

WOLVERINE DATED AN ASIAN?!?!

Perhaps I should have prefaced this with two things. Number one: I am an Asian female. Number two: I don’t know all that much about Wolverine’s history. I just recently got obsessively into comic books (I was only a light reader before) and I’m still learning the ins and outs of the Marvel ‘verse. It’s friggin’ overwhelming, to say the least, but I’m holding on by my pinkies. And now I know: WOLVERINE DATED AN ASIAN. If Wikipedia serves me well, he was even engaged to her at one point. Her name’s Mariko Yashida and damn, gurl got game! Apparently she’s going to be a main character in the upcoming film. My guess? It’s gonna be The Last Samurai with mutants. White man in a strange exotic Azn world. But WHATEVER, I’m just happy that there’ll be an Asian in the mainstream media (i.e. movies, cartoons) Marvel ‘verse that isn’t Lady Deathstrike. While she did look cool in X-2, if memory serves me correctly, she didn’t even have one line of dialogue. BORING. And she just generally gets on my nerves – Dragon Lady stereotype to the max, dude. (Wikipedia definition: A Dragon Lady is a misogynistic stereotype of East Asian women as mean, deceitful, domineering, or mysterious.)

But back to the whole WOLVERINE DATED AN ASIAN?!?! thing (I have to put it in all caps every time, it’s the only way to properly express my initial shock) – It makes me unreasonably happy to know that at least one superhero has a penchant for Asian women. Hey, Marvel, can we give Deadpool an Asian fetish? I mean, Wolverine’s cool and all, but I like my men with a rapier wit and a natural cleverness. Wolverine, while a bona fide undeniable badass, is a bit monosyllabic for my romantic tastes.

And, since who knows when I’ll talk about Wolverine again, here’s a link to my favorite scene from Mallrats. Whenever someone mentions good ol’ Logan, I have to quote this. I’m sure it’s become quite annoying to some of my acquaintances.

P.S. Kevin Smith is a god.

P.P.S. Check out Wolverine (and the lovely Domino) in the X-Force: Sex and Violence series. Part of a panel of the first issue is up at the top of this blog. The third, and last, issue of the series is out on September 8th. The art’s beautiful. And I may or may not have picked it up at my local comic book store because of the title. Mmm, sex and violence. Two of my favorite things. JUST KIDDING. Kinda.